I hired Fat Fingers Friday as my personal assistant because his CV demonstrated an ability to be in the vicinity of great history in the making:
- Lookout on RMS Titanic
- Rope wrangler at Naval Air Station Lakehurst
- Health and safety inspector for the Apollo 13 mission
- Guangzhou airport baggage handler
You can imagine my surprise, then, to discover that Friday is completely unreliable, incompetent and slovenly. And, frankly, the Order of the Black Heart only has room for one person of that description.
The Order is therefore contemplating undertaking a transparent organisational matrix review with the aim of enhancing strategic alignment between the customer-facing divisions and the business support functions to identify synergies for integrating the deep-diving granularity of our customer experience experiences. It is possible, though not yet firmly decided, that such a game-changing 360 review may lead to the reallocation of key personnel resources and in certain dovetailing scenarios a re-conceptualising of overall workforce requirements. By about one.
I’ve done a The Google first-cut credentials review of some high-powered consulting-types that could assist the Order in this fairly tricky manoeuvre and have come up with the following:
- Boston Bun Consulting Group
- Pain & Company
- Joe’s Lube and Brakes (Taihape) Limited
So a big call out to the Order’s
infernal internal stakeholders to let me know if you’ve ever used any of the above, and what you’d recommend as a going-forward approach in the current fiscal circumstances.