332. I Bet He Can Drop Kick Too

R_82422295_reuters_kim3eports from the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea that Kim Jong-un has climbed the country’s highest mountain, when combined with worrying news about Aaron Cruden’s knee, lead me to suggest that Mr Kim be offered the role of All Blacks first five-eighth in the upcoming Rugby World Cup.

Put aside for the moment the fact that he is not eligible to play rugby for New Zealand, or indeed that as far as we know he has never played rugby at all, and consider these remarkable accomplishments:

  • drove a car at age 3
  • won a yacht race at age 9
  • named The Onion‘s Sexiest Man Alive 2012

Of course he comes from a long line of incredible super-achievers. His father Kim Jong-il scored 38-under par in his first game of golf (including 5 holes in one), composed 6 operas in 2 years “all of which are better than any in the history of music”, and wrote 1,500 books before graduating from Kim Il-sung University. His grandfather, the aforementioned Kim Il-sung, wasn’t born as such, but came down from heaven.

All in all, I think you’d agree, he’s almost certainly probably nearly a shoo-in to do unusually phenomenal things on the field, especially if he’s allowed to bring his own personal security detachment – the 950,000-strong Korean People’s Army.

About Ned Davy

By hokey, the big fella’s tipped into his 50s. A rangy loose forward in his prime, good with the ball in hand, but rarely up with the play any more.
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2 Responses to 332. I Bet He Can Drop Kick Too

  1. But can he drop kick …. from halfway?

    • Ned Davy says:

      Halfway? Halfway???

      The man could do a double backflip with quadruple twist and drop kick from the other side of the moon while blindfolded. And what a haircut!

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